Infrequently Asked Questions

Why do Europeans and North Americans seem smarter than the rest of the world?

Because their education system doesn’t emphasize rote learning.

Why do people get married? And I’m not talking about religion, here, as marriage existed way before Judaism, Christianity, Islam.

Because women love weddings, and men get the housework done for free.

What about men who do housework?

These type of people are to be admired and despised at the same time.

What’s the greatest piece of technology ever invented?

The book. It can be carried anywhere, it doesn’t require a power source, it’s extremely durable, and it’s incredibly, incredibly useful.

Who’s the smartest person in the world?

Marilyn vos Savant. (And I’m not providing a link to Wikipedia, so that you have to look it up yourself. Hahaha!)

Who’s the most beautiful woman in the world?

Depends on who’s asking.

Why does evil exist?

No good without evil.

Okay, there doesn’t have to be evil. Why can’t there just be good, and gooder?

Why don’t you stop being evil by pestering me with all these questions.

Name me one Indonesian heavy metal band.

Burgerkill.

Sometimes the traffic at Lebuhraya Bukit Jalil is backed up all the way to the LDP, and sometimes it’s clear all the way. What gives?

I have completely no idea.

What’s the difference between can’t and couldn’t?

One has 7 letters, and the other one has 4.

How to be successful?

Define success to be something that you can easily achieve.

How to be happy?

Happiness is a feeling. Like all feelings, it’s an automatic response to external events. It’s something we can’t help. So to be happy we need “positive” things to happen, like doing something we enjoy, or being with people we like. But even then, after awhile, boredom sets in. So it’s something transient. A better question would be, “how to have inner peace?”

How to have inner peace?

Pay me money and I’ll tell you.

Why does the earth spin around its axis?

I bet your kid asked you this. You know what? I tried to google this one and couldn’t find a definite answer. I even tried Yahoo! Answers and Ask.com. Someone help me!

Given that the earth is rotating at 1100 mph, if someone jumps high up then why doesn’t he land a few miles away from the place he jumped?

Why must the “someone” be a “he”? Women jump too.

Okay, he or she.

He or she what?

Look, I’m not going to repeat the whole question! You know what I mean! You’re quibbling about insignificant matters because you don’t know the answer, don’t you?

You’re being very rude. I’m afraid I have to ask you to leave.

Why do women have higher standards of personal hygiene than men?

For millenia, men worked whilst women stayed home. Men had money to attract women; all women had were their physical appearance. But now that women are financially independent, men can no longer count on being a good breadwinner to be attractive. So that’s why deodorant and even facial foam for men are getting increasingly popular.

Why do I need to go to the office? With broadband, I can work wherever I want. Why do I need to travel back and forth and put up with all the traffic jams? What matters is that I get my work done on time. (I don’t work for a leading employment website.)

You’re right. Stay at home, then.

But I’ll get fired!

Then get to the office, already! Jeez.

This IAQ is boring.

What, the whole point of the universe is to entertain you? Go to lolcats, then.

(Whiny voice) Lolcats is even more boring!

You’re right. xkcd!

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3 Comments

  1. Wow, you really nailed the questions. You should open your own column like Marilyn vos Savant.

  2. I couldn’t agree more.

  3. I’m afraid I’m not as clever as Ms vos Savant. For instance, I got the wrong answer for The Game Show Problem.

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